As most other like-minded people I have not paid Paris Hilton much attention over the years. Perfume, The Simple Life, Gossip – no thanks.
About 6 months ago I was vegging out in front of the TV. Flicking, hoping, drifting and then… My prayers were answered, I had found something special.
If I had to fuck a guy, who would make the top 5? (Part 1: Numbers 5 – 3)
Special mention 1st has to go to 2 guys that nearly made the list – Brando and Macaulay Culkin. Brando as I could have tucked him into bed like a giant baby, singing “who’s a wee fatty?” as I played with his big saggy balls. Macaulay Culkin (in home alone) as he was a little prick that needed a good pumping. Would have enjoyed flushing his head down the toilet as I ejaculated a mixture of cum and rumpuss down his neck. Yummy.
Another Good name for a cat is Russel Crowe. I know what your thinking “Hey isn’t Russel Crowe a cunt?”
Right you know how ‘Chef Ramsey’ is a cool name? Did you also know its a great name for your cat?
Terry Wogan slams cunts.
It’s true. Look at the recent Jonathan Ross Russel brand controversy. As soon as I heard the news I knew it was only a matter of time before he fucking slammed those motherfuckers to a wall.
I was about to write about a bus journey from a few days ago, but I may as well write about my current situation.
Sitting on the train. I was sitting nice and cosily in the corner, table to myself, laptop out… all looking good.
“Did you reserve that?” said in a shite Yorkshire accent, where seemingly they only and always emphasise the last word of every sentence.
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